Sun Bowl Whether Report

Welcome to the last whether of the year & my last Sun Bowl preview post. Those of you who already left for El Paso will miss my official pick! Ha!

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...the city of El Paso is welcoming Cats fans with open arms.
According to the chamber of commerce, and I quote, "Yes."

...the city of El Paso is welcoming Bruins fans with open arms.
Arms, yes. Small arms, specfically.

...you had a nice Christmas.
Why yes I did. You're so considerate. Did you enjoy the holiday?

...you really think I can answer that.
I don't see why not.

...you believe these questions come from an actual person.
I guess I hadn't thought about it. Where do they come from.

...we can just do the pick and be done with this.
Fine. Bitchy little non-entity you are.

Sun Bowl pick after the jump.

...you're picking the Cats in a mild upset.
Wait for it....of course I am. I'm nothing if not a guy who always picks the Cats to win. I've got the line as UCLA -3, O/U 74.5. I'm going with NU 41, UCLA 34. That's right, 13 FGs and a safety. You heard it here first, people.

Sun Bowl Road Trip Guide

A bowl game, as opposed to a regular-season road trip, offers greater opportunities for side trips and planned vacation-y events. If you're there for a few days, you'll need to spend the time somehow. Also, there are frequently more friends and NU-ites around a bowl game. So, here are some large group suggestions for your time in El Paso.

Go see NUMB
A marching band is a great sight-seeing event for large groups, because it typically costs nothing to watch them and they play in large venues. Don't limit yourself to the pregame pep rally though. Seek out NUMB in it's natural habitat: it's hotel or practice field. Remember that the band is there to entertain, so insist that NUMBers dress in uniform and perform for you at all times. You're not paying top dollar on this vacation for nothing.

Go to Mexico
We all know by now that El Paso is right on the border with Mexico. Many people will want to take the opportunity to visit a foreign country. Go for it! Pile in some cars and drive over there. People may tell you that it's easy to sneak across the border, but go the legit way through an official crossing. Once you're in Mexico, you may feel like experiencing an authentic experience. Do it! Spend time time learning about real life there. Then maybe you'll abandon your group and sneak back into the States. You can see which route is fastest!

Build a Fort
All of the harassing NUMB and getting arrested will get you pretty tired. When you retire to your hotel room, you'll want to be comfortable. But, you're on vacation so you should still live a little while you rest. Build a fort in your room. Use available materials, or bring some supplies with you. Recommended: duct tape, pen, paper, twine, screwdriver. Just remember, "Fort Awesome" is a registered trademark of Josh Held Escort Service, Inc. Come up with your own name, huh?

See you in El Paso!

Sun Bowl Weather Forecast

The official forecast for Friday in El Paso is 64 degrees and sunny with no chance of rain. Yeah, so I guess that's pretty nice. Not really football whether though. My personal forecast calls for Chicago area NU fans to collect some snow before they get on their planes. Bring that snow and throw it the Bruins. See if they're as hardy as their mascot would imply.

Cats win!

Pam Ward: Now with less hate

ESPN college football and basketball broadcaster Pam Ward has officially dropped to a lower hate level in my tiny little mind. Thanks to a funny interview appearance on the Mister Tony show, she moves out of the ranks of Jay Mariotti and joins such minor hatees as Mike Lupica and Stu Scott.

Listen Live to Mister Tony [sportstalk980] (free registration required)

Sun Bowl Preview: Part 3

The last part of my Sun Bowl preview starts with special teams. This is a tough one to call. On one hand, both teams stack up pretty evenly against each other. UCLA has slightly better punt returning, but NU is better on kickoffs. UCLA covers punts better, but NU covers kickoffs a little better, due mostly to squib and pop-up kicks.

Running back Maurice Drew is UCLA's main punt returner, and the national leader in that category. If NU's punting is improved a little bit from the end of the season, this shouldn't hurt them. But big plays on special teams could be a difference if it's a close game.

Names after the jump!

Just call him "Ryan" and be done with it - Shawn "Ryan" Oatis (Fr, S) from Chino, CA.
Band of Brothers - Korey & Kyle Bosworth (Fr, LBs), Joe and Patrick Cowan (Jr, WR & Fr, QB), Marko & Nikola Dragovic (Sr & So, DEs), Chad & Chase Moline (Jr, LB & Fr, DE).
Positionally named - Gavin Ketchum (Fr, WR).
For the last time in 2005 - Baumgartner, Carter, Havner, Heater, Meyer, Pitre, Rauscher, Sieber, Slater, Taylor (x2), Turner, Walker.

Sun Bowl Preview: Part 2

Welcome back to my Sun Bowl preview. Today we'll focus on when Northwestern has the ball on offense.

NU will need to keep it's offensive balance to score the points needed to win this game. Fortunately, I hope, UCLA may offer that opportunity. The Bruins' defense is fairly poor. Overall, it ranks 111th in the country. 64th against the pass and 117th against the run. They give up 4 more yards per game rushing than Illinois. The defense is led in tackles by senior linebacker Spencer Havner

If Tyrell and Baz can rush for 200+ yards, the passing game should open up nicely. UCLA's average pass defense should be a good opportunity for the Cats to spread the ball to many receivers.

Sun Bowl Preview: Part 1

Welcome to the first of a three part preview of the Sun Bowl. The ApostroCats will be taking on the UCLA Bruins in what everyone expects to be a high-scoring affair. Not the kind of affair that you see on The Young and The Restless, although those have lots of scoring too. In that spirit -- the football one -- I'll try to break down my preview into three sections: When UCLA has the ball, when NU has the ball, and special teams. Today, we look at the UCLA offense matched up against the NU defense.

The big three, as every team must have, for UCLA are senior quarterback Drew Olson, junior running back Maurice Drew, and senior tight end Marcedes Lewis. Behind these three, plus several others (7 receivers with 10+ catches, 3 backs with 30+ carries) the Bruins' offense is in the top 25 overall nationwide and the top 20 in passing. Olson is the country's third best passer (QB rating or 165.2) and can be expected to make a lot of good decisions and good throws.

More after the jump.

The Wildcats will have to depend heavily on the linebacking corps and safeties to keep UCLA's rushing and middle-distance passing attack from creating too many big plays. As usual, this will fall more on the shoulders of senior middle linebacker Tim "Two-Ton" McGarigle. That's not his nickname, really. It's just one of the best nicknames ever in general, as far as I'm concerned. Staring LBs Adam Kadela and Nick Roach will factor heavily as well.

In the secondary, look for two safeties that didn't see much or any time at the end of the season. Freshman Brendan Smith should be back from his leg injury and junior Brian Heinz is said to be available for the Sun Bowl after missing the entire regular season with an injury. If both NU safeties put in strong games, the defense may hold UCLA down just enough!

Cats ate Pirates

So, the NU Basketball Wildcats beat Seton Hall 44-42 out in Jersey this morning. The most interesting thing about the win from my perspective was not Hachad's game-winning shot with seconds remaining. It's not the fact that Double-V scored almost half our points -- 18 out of 44.

It's that I was sure the game was scheduled for tomorrow night. I don't know how I came to be so sure of that piece of falsitude. But, in double-checking the TV clearance for the game, I discovered it was already over. Good for me.

Time for my being aware of the basketball schedule now has come.

Bowl Predictions

Here are my bowl game picks for 2005-2006. I'm leaving the Sun Bowl out, so that I can pick that one later.

Favorites in bold, where line is available:

New Orleans: Southern Miss 35, Arkansas St 10
GMAC: Toleda 42, UTEP 27
Las Vegas: California 27, BYU 20
Poinsettia: Navy 23, Colorado State 17
Fort Worth: Houston 20, Kansas 17
Hawaii: Nevada 33, UCF 28
Motor City: Akron 35, Memphis 31
Champs Sports: Clemson 20, Colorado 6
Insight: Arizona State 30, Rutgers 20
MPC: Boise State 33, BC 17
Alamo: Michigan 23, Nebraska 10
Emeral: Georgia Tech 21, Utah 14
Holiday: Oregon 37, Oklahoma 17
Music City: Minnesota 28, Virginia 27
Sun: Ha! You've gotta wait on this one.
Independence: South Carolina 20, Missouri 13
Peach: LSU 13, Miami 7
Meineke: USF 24, NC State 21
Liberty: Fresno State 27, Tulsa 13
Houston: TCU 30, Iowa State 20
Cotton: Alabama 14, Texas Tech 13
Outback: Iowa 23, Florida 14
Gator: Virginia Tech 28, Louisville 27
Capital One: Auburn 17, Wisconsin 13
Fiesta: Ohio State 20, Notre Dame 10
Sugar: Georgia 30, West Virginia 17
Orange: Penn State 13, Florida State 10
Rose: USC 35, Texas 33

How to Play with a Piglet

Ahh. This is the wikiHow that I know and love! A site that routinely tells me how to do things I never would have thought about. And now I totally want to play with a piglet!


How to Play With a Piglet [wikiHow]

Bowlognomy!

Out in the west Texas town of El Paso...is the only El Paso reference I can think of. So, yippee! We'll be taking on the UCLA Bruins on December 30th!

Go Cats!

How not to explain how to be funny

So, I'm not usually a jerk here. And I try to mention things that are good and funny. And I usually like wikiHow a lot. But this one is just stupid.

The premise is, "How to Be Funny Without Telling Jokes."

The suggestions? Write out your jokes, so you're not actually telling them; do physical comedy; just go ahead and tell jokes.

Wow. Not exactly inspired, my good chums. Better luck next time.

How to Be Funny Without Telling Jokes [wikiHow]

Rankage

Yay for the BCS! That supposedly inscrutable formula - hello people, it's polls, averages and schedule strength; It's nothing fancy - has moved NU up to #22 from #25. This is exactly how it should be, because NU is not that far below other Big Ten teams like Michigan and Wisconsin. Those two are at #18 and #19 (not respectively). I'm a big BCS fan. Mostly a computer ranking fan, but a BCS fan too.

So, yay for that.

NU 38, Illinois 21

Nothing tastes better than sweet sweet tomahawk goodness. Even though the game was close for most of the time, it was never really in doubt. And the second half defense was really quite nice. Take away half of those long pass plays by the Illini, and you'd say our defense was great.

But, those plays did exist, and our defense isn't great. But key stops and a Cofield interception that still makes me laugh were the story. It's a nice little story. It was totally worth getting up at 4:30 for it.

Mostly, I'm glad about the Sutton and Baz ego boost that went on. Having both guys star in a win was exactly what we need before a bowl game. I'm thinking we could actually win that thing!

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 7.7 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 1-0 = +1 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 11: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 8 wins (10-1 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 6 wins (5-3 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 7-4

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Pretty much exactly what I was hoping for. Good on that!
Cats' D: The 2nd half shutdowns are getting nice. I hope for one more.
Cats' Special Teams: Mmmmm....fastball.

Let's go Cats!

Illinois Weather Forecast

Tomorrow is the Cats' last Big Ten game of the year. It will also be the coldest, so make sure you've got something warm and purple. To wear. Not just to have and look at, because then it won't keep you warm. Unless you have a purple space heater.

Anyway.

It won't be that cold - mid 40s- but there's a chance of rain. So, if you're going to the game prepare for cold and wet. If you're playing in the game, then can you put a little sticker on your helmet? It could say "Hi Josh," or "josheatsbirds.blogspot.com." because that would be epic.

Cats win!

Illinois Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...Coaches Walker and Zook were college teammates.
Awesomely, they were.

...there's somewhere to learn more about that.
Check out the Daily article 'bout it.

...that really means anything for this game.
Well, probably not. Except maybe Randy still has a little animus toward Ron from the incident mentioned in that article.

...NU will rush for over 200 yards.
I really think so. This ought to be Tyrell's game to remind everyone why he was recognized nation-wide a few weeks ago.

...Baz will throw for over 200.
I think he will. I hope it comes early, and they can move him out of the game for Bacher.

...You've got a pick.
Line is NU -14.5, O/U 63.5. I'm going NU 35, UI 14. But, I think the score at the end of the third quarter will be 35-7.

Illinois Preview

Ok. My computer is being wacky, so I'm gonna try to do this fast - before it crashes on me again. Which is basically every time I move it. Eek!

Illinois is "led" by junior quarterback Tim Brasic. This is his first year starting, and he has been spelled at times by perennial backup Chris Pazan. Rushing is accomplished by Pierre Thomas Jr, Brasic and E.B. Halsey. Halsey and Thomas are among the top receivers, along with Kyle Hudson, DaJuan Warren and Kendrick Jones.

The Illini offense has been bad in three of the last four games, but they showed a little more against Wisconsin. If NU can score well, against a lax scoring defense, it should go well for the ApostroCats on Satuday.

Names after the jump.

* That's right. Fifth. - Will Bergen V (Fr, OL)
* Just rolls off your tongue - Kyle Schnettgoecke (Sr, OL)
* One J - J Leman (So, LB)
* Two Js - JJ Simmons (Jr, OL)
* Girls name - Jody Ellis (Fr, DB)
* - Bower, Buckner, Connor, Cooper, Creamer, Frazier, Kleckner, Kraemer, Kruger, Miller, Pilcher, Porter, Pryor, Shafer, Walker x2

Illinois Road Trip Guide

It's back. It's the road trip guide. I'm finally making another road trip, so you get to share in my fun. I've done a guide to U of I in the past, so I'll pick different things here.

*** Getting there is 0.49*(the fun)
The trip from Chicago to Champaign is pretty easy. Take some time to enjoy the sights along the way: The Aroma Park aroma museum - prepare your nostrils for Chambana at this road-side stop; The Illinois state mint in Monee, IL - don't try to spend the money they print there, because they just do it for fun.

***Special U of I fan section
I think there are probably some Illini fans in the Chicago area who are making the trip on Saturday. So, let me remind you how to get there:
1) Get on the expressway of your choice, and drive 80 mph in the right lane.
2) Ask the police officer how to get to I-88 West.
3) Take 88 until you get to Champaign. Don't take no guff from anyone who tries to trick you by saying you're going the wrong way.
4) Enjoy the game.

***Dress code
Just like the NBA, I am forcing a dress code on y'all. It's easy to remember, I promise:
Acceptable attire
- purple
Unacceptable
- not purple

See you downstate!

The Sweet Sioux Tomahawk Legend

Way back in the mid-40s, a lovely girl named Sue was a student at the University of Illinois. During her second year, she had an internship in Chicago, and she met a lot of great people from Northwestern. She decided to transfer to NU.

Sadly, for some, Sue was the only attendee at any of the football games in Champaign while she was there. Her transfer theatened the Illini with their first zero-attendance season since, well, the year before Sue started at U of I. The players and coaches were so disturbed that they challenged Northwestern to a bet: whoever won the next football game would get to keep Sweet Sue.

And so, this young woman became a college football travelling trophy.

More after the jump.

Bad news for Sue? The Illini won here a couple times. Years of sitting in a trophy case in Urbana with only fish flakes to eat (see disturbed players, above) had the inevitable result.

The following year, NU won the rivalry game. When the Cats tried to collect Sue, U of I had to fess up.

"But how about we give you something else?" suggested a team manager. "We've got this tomahawk thing lying around. We stole it from some Indians, and then we used it to threaten them until they taught us their tradtions. Now we misuse those traditions! Isn't that cool?"

The Cats thought that was just fine, and so the Sweet Sioux Tomahawk - jointly named for Sue and the oppressed American Indians - took up it's place as the schools' rivalry trophy.

OSU 48, NU 7

Well, that was kind of depressing. Perhaps it was not unexpected, but it was still no fun. It wasn't as bad as, say Hawaii last year - which I still refuse to review - but I don't feel like being funny about it. I'm still gonna do the StatWatch after the jump, but until then how about some happy fun things.

Happy thing 1: Northwestern's basketball season began last night with a win over Lehigh. The 61-59 victory moves NU to the semifinals of the Black Coaches Association Invitational in Wyoming where they will face Charlotte tonight. The Cats' strong 2nd half shooting made up for a lame 1st half and a 28-21 halftime deficit. Good play by star forward Vedran Vukusic (25 points) led the team to a win to start 2005-2006.

Happy thing 2: I got my car tested for emissions this morning, and I totally passed with flying colors - mostly medium red. The test was quick, there was no line, and the inspectors were competent and friendly! Kudos, Illinois EPA!

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 3.8 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 1-2 = -1 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 10: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 7 wins (9-1 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 5 wins (4-3 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 6-4

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Barely there. Have no further comment.
Cats' D: See above.
Cats' Special Teams: Right back in that game changing performance nonsense. In a bad way this time.

Let's go Cats!

Ohio State Weather Forecast

It sounds like the weather in Columbus should be pretty nice tomorrow. Good football weather, as they say, as if there is any weather that is not good for football. I mean, you can play football upside-down on the space shuttle; no one really cares about the weather.

But, I guess the several fans in attendance might want to know what they're in for. The forecast calls for sun and temperatures in the high 50s to low 60s. Late morning clouds will provide the cover for the daring escape of three convicts from nearby prison. Let me tell you, these guys HATE pleasant fall afternoons. There's a 40% chance of blows raining down upon anyone who crosses paths with these fine fellows tomorrow.

Cats win!

Ohio State Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...this game really matters at all.
On one hand, no. Finishing out with two more wins (which would include aOsu) would probably push into at least the Sun Bowl, while a loss to aOsu might give them a chance for a BCS at-large pick...moving everyone up a spot (including NU to El Paso as well, if we beat UI.)

...there's another hand in there.
Yeah. Winning would give us some momentum and some hype. Carrying those to and through the next game would be big, no matter where we play in the post-season.

...you have a preference.
I'd much rather get into a nice bowl by winning that losing.

...you're going to this game.
Nah. I put in my time at the Shoe, and I didn't enjoy it. It wouldn't be pleasant if we were to win, and I wouldn't be happy if we were to lose.

...you've got a big plans then for Saturday.
1. Go shopping.
2. Watch College Gameday
3. Curse Lee Corso
4. Cats eat buckeyes

More after the jump.

...you've seen the spread this week.
Yup.

...you think it's way high.
Yes and no. I think if aOsu wins, it could be by a lot. They did actually cover a 34(?) point spread last week.

...that scares you off picking the Cats.
Hellz no. Line is aOsu -19, O/U 57. I've got NU 33, aOsu 27. I dunno, that score just speaks to me or something.

Ohio State Preview

Forgive me if this entry isn't as tight as some others. I usually draft these things on the bus, so I have some thoughts before I start typing. Not today baby! It's fully off-the-cuff. And the cuff is on the top of my head! You'd better pray for death, gentle reader, because I'm coming for you.

Saturday, the ApostroCats will make an appearance on ABC (split-nationally) against one of those Ohio state universities. I can't remember which one, exactly. The one with the O on the helmet. For simplicity, let's call them aOsu.

The offense for aOsu is improved over last year, when it struggled at times. Junior Troy Smith has the QB job locked up and Antonio Pittman (So, RB) is the primary rushing threat. Smith has two big time passing targets in Santonio Holmes and Ted "Peter Gunn" Ginn Jr. Both are big play threats whenever they catch the ball. They also will run reverses and end-arounds to those two. And they return kicks! Plus they fight crime under the monicker "The aOsume Twosome."

NU Key: Make first tackles and gang tackles.

aOsu defense and players after the jump.

The Freakeye defense leads the conference in fewest points allowed, and it is helmed by linebacker A.J. Hawk. About Hawk, it has been said, "his mama's so ugly, Maurice Clarett hangs her picture in his car so no one steals his CDs." Read that last sentence out loud, if you please. There, I just heard you say it. Now quit complaining that I make stuff up.

NU Key: Well-mixed offense. 1 part Tyrell, 1 part Baz, dash of receivers. Shake well and pour over A.J. Hawk.

* Which is the best major? - Turf Science (Jordan Hoewischer), Exploring (John Kerr), Sports & Leisure (Curtis Terry)
*** Bonus! Which major is a Trivial Pursuit category?
* Girls' names - Mike D'Andrea (Sr, LB), Nate Salley (Sr, S)
* Shake shake shake - Ashton Youboty (Jr, CB)...this is never not funny to me.
* Um, er... - Carpenter, Denlinger, Ebner, Franzinger, Garnier, Hoewischer, Hoobler, Potokar, Schafer, Schnittker (awesome lack of vowels there too), Skinner, Spitler, Whitner, Winner

Go Cats!

I'm a haiku loser

So, I entered Gizmodo's Earbudclips haiku contest, but I guess I didn't make the cut. Well, my loss is your gain, because now I can share my entry plus my favorite of the finalists.

My entry:
My earbuds untied
I can listen to Journey
"Don't Stop Believin'"

My favorite finalist (Ryan):
Earbudclips are gay,
But I want some anyway,
Free stuff all the way.

Haiku contest finalists [Gizmodo]

End of the 1st half - clarified

For those of you who attended the game on Saturday, allow me to clarify what happened with the clock during the last 20 seconds of the 1st half.

• Iowa pass near the sideline; the receiver appears to get out of bounds. The whistle blows with about 30+ seconds remaining. An official (SJ?) winds his arm to keep the clock rolling - indicating that forward progress stopped before the sideline.
• With about 20 seconds remaining, the whistle blows again to stop the clock. The officials apparently decide that the receiver DID get out of bounds; the clock should have stopped.
• Confused Iowa spikes the ball just in case
• Iowa spikes the ball again (just in case?)*
• Iowa gets a pass play down inside the 5
• Iowa incomplete pass.
• Iowa FG attempt good.

Props to ESPN for running the game between 3 and 4am this morning.

* I'm not totally sure the first spike even counted as a play.

NU 28, Iowa 27

Yippee! Everyone enjoy the win and the bowl eligibility.........now freeze! Ha! I just wanted to make you freeze with that silly grin you get while thinking about San Antonio. But, before we get ahead of ourselves, let's remember that the three most storied programs in the Big Ten are ahead of us, as is recently impressive Wisconsin. So, we're gonna have to win our way into any bowl that doesn't contain the word "City."

But, with a quarterback like Baz, I think we can do just that. Those two TD drives in the last 3 minutes would beat any team in the country. And I think our offense can keep us that close to anyone.

I also think (hope hope hope) that we're seeing the major emergence of Ross Lane as a receiver who's a threat on possession passes and the big deepness. I fall asleep dreaming of Lane, Sutton and...um...Bacher, I guess. Speaking of Sutton, here's hoping he steps up in his home state next week.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 6.6 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 0-2 = -2 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 9: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 7 (8-1 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 5 (3-3 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 6-3

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: See, those last drives are what it's all about. It needs to be about that more often.
Cats' D: The sieve-like run defense give me chills. The bad kind.
Cats' Special Teams: Hey! STer of the week in the Big Ten again. Good boy, Joel. Now, let us never need an onside kick again.

Let's go Cats!

Iowa Weather Forecast

The last home game of the 2005 season (barring an unexpected Windy City Bowl appearance, I guess) is going to be unseasonably warm. To go along with the throwback temperatures, both schools are fielding teams from the past. In continued celebration of its 10th anniversary, Northwestern's 1995 Big Ten champs will again take the field. In an interesting move, Iowa will be fielding its last place 1999 Hawkeyes (1-10) - a team that ended NU's 11-game Big Ten slide by losing in Evanston that year.

The warm weather will be Pasadena-like, and the lack of anyone named Keyshawn will lift the Rose Bowl Wildcats to victory!

Cats win!

Iowa Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...you're over the disappointment from last week.
Yeah, I am. It took until Sunday night or Monday morning.

...you think this game is just as important.
I do. Since we beat MSU, I've felt it was most important to win one of these two home games.

...it wouldn't be better to win both.
Well, duh. But we're past that now, and we need to focus on the potential that remains.

...you've learned any interesting information about Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz.
I have it on good authority that Ferentz is a big stinky doodoo-head. You heard it here first, so if Deadspin or Newsday tries to rip me off, they've got another thing coming.

More after the jump.

...you'll favor us with a song.
So sweet of you to ask!

Informer, you no say daddy me Snow me I'll go blame
A licky boom boom down

Wait wait wait!

Oh. You meant the other song I had prepared. It's pretty long, so it will follow my picks. Spread is Iowa -2, O/U 60.5. I gots NU 35, Iowa 20.

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the shucking of the corn
They have outlawed education where the black and gold are worn
And when the game is over, Hawkeye fans will start to mourn
The Cats are marching on!

Although your homes are mobile, your team isn't on the go
We'll be out in Pasadena while you're sitting home in snow
You'll be nodding off at halftime while your band is park-and-blow
The Cats are marching on!

Sorry, sorry little Hawkeyes
When, if ever, will you realize
There's more to life than watching corn rise?
The Cats are marching on!

As always, if I got the lyrics different than you remember, it's because I hate you. Please tell me what I did wrong and I'll correct it post-haste.

Iowa Preview

Iowa's year began with much hope, but a week 2 loss to Iowa State cut down their national title hopes. They have a very good defense (17.9 PApg), but an offense (29.6 PFpg) that seems weak compared to the now high-scoring Big Ten. Some will say that the Hawkeyes' offensive issues stem from injuries at running back. Others will look at the recent string of different signal callers who preceded 2nd year starter Drew Tate (Jr.). Those people aren't fit to iron my taco shells!

The real reason Iowa is always a step short of complete success is that famous pink visitor's locker room. Not unlike many male athletes, Iowa players are nervous about homosexuals in their sport. The pink paint is meant to symbolize "gay" and isolate it away from the field. A gay opponent is the Hawkeye's #1 fear, not because of lifestyle differences, but because Iowa players believe in a certain homosexual athletic prowess. I don't know if they're right or wrong about that, but I suggest a steady diet of Tyrell around the right end, with some smoldering glances from "Big Sexy" Zach Strief.

Playaz after the jump.

Names you should know:
* QB "How my" Drew Tate (#5)
* RB Albert Young (#21)
* WRs Clinton, Solomon, Hinkel
* LBs Chad Greenway, Abdul Hodge

Names you want to know:
* Schlicher the kicker - Kyle Schlicker (Jr, K)
* Girls names - Dana Brown (Fr, RB), Shannon Browning (So, DE)
* Not a name - Champ Davis Jr. (Jr, RB)
* Can eat no fat - Jacob "Jack" Spratt (So, DL)
* So many this week! - Angerer (double-er!), Becker, Bentler, Chandler, Chinander, DeVolder, Dollmeyer, Felder (I hardly even knew 'er!), Fenstermaker (another double!), Fletcher, Postier, Ryther, Schlicher, Walker

Michigan 33, NU 17

Well, compared to our two previous losses to Michigan, this wasn't so bad. I know it feels pretty lousy, but in a little bit of hindsight I'm starting to think it was just a game between two good teams and 1 had a much better night. I don't believe that in 10 rematches we would be below 100 yards rushing that often. Or that we would miss so many tackles every game.

Or, hopefully, that Baz would seem to make so many bad reads. It's not the two picks that get me. I don't think we believed he'd go the whole season throwing for 300 yards each game and only throw one interception. Hoped? Yes. Believed? Nah. The problem was that his much-touted vision was not with him tonight. Maybe the picks shook him up. Seems plausible, but he was Zak Kustok circa 2001: too many bad decisions among otherwise good play.

Before the StatWatch, as much as it pains me, kudos to Lloyd Carr and the Michigan offensive game plan. They kept our secondary off balance with major shifts before each play (with no procedure penalties) and our best defenders (Roach and McGarigle) from killing them by throwing long outside passes.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 6.7 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 4-3 = +1 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 8: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 6 (7-1 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 5 (3-2 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 5-3

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Too bad we couldn't move the ball on the ground. It would have been the difference.
Cats' D: Not that bad, by our standards, but we need a little more technique to go with hard hitting.
Cats' Special Teams: Kickoffs could have been better. A FG was nice to see too.

Let's go Cats!

Eat a sandwich!

Nice little quote from Coach Walker about Baz:

"He has become a better physical specimen," Walker said on the ADT Coaches' Spotlight Show on Tuesday. "I let him wear short-sleeved shirts. It used to be turtlenecks and long-sleeved shirts. I told him, 'Eat a sandwich and get in the weight room.'"

found it on...Ivan Maisel [ESPN.com]

Responsible Spam

Too too awesome.

Responsible Spam [McSweeney's]

Michigan Weather Forecast

The conditions during Saturday evening's game will be influenced by two colliding fronts. The first, a homecoming front, will bring in loads of purple sweatshirts and senior citizens (Class of 1995? Damn old, man.) The second, a halloween front, will produce pimps and hos and tablecloth ghosts.

So, the forecast calls for purple tablecloth ghosts and elderly pimps and hos. This combination will prove to be too scary for the Wolvlatrines.

Cats Win!

p.s. It's scaaaaaaaary!

Michigan Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...it's nice to be heading back to Dyche for NU football.
Yeah, it really really is.

...there's something wrong with watching at Tom's house.
No no no. I just don't think his neighbors like being told to pray for death

...anyone likes that.
Well, Steve Breaston does. Try it out tomorrow.

...you've got your homecoming all planned out.
It goes a little something like this: play, watch, drink. eat, drink, play, watch, play, watch, drink.

...you've got fight song lyrics for us.
I hope we won't be hearing this too much, but I'm providing Dr. Thompson's lyrics from the NUMBalum newsletter. Your milage may vary.

What is a victors valiant?
Who are the conquering heroes?
Fail, fail you michigan,
You must be second best!

MICE from the wolverine state
CATS have decided your fate
Fail, fail you michigan,
The armpit of the west.

Picks after the jump.

...we can really win.
Hell yes.

...you're picking us to win.
Nice to see some new people here. The line is Michigan -3, O/U 62. I've got NU 42, Michigan 28.

Michigan Preview

This week's matchup with Michigan is certainly intriguing and it is deservedly garnering national attention. Obviously, the Cats are the higher-ranked team and have the home field and homecoming advantages in their favor. A look at the stats and and a little memory reveals that NU has an edge in offensive numbers and a recent history of stepping up the defense for homecoming. BUT. This is Michigan, and that always seems to be a meaningful fact for us. When's the last time we demolished Michigan? Not in the last 10 meetings anyway. And you can expect to see some "maize" in the stands.

That doesn't mean I don't thinke we'll win. I always think we're gonna win, and lately I've been right a little. Baz, Sutton, Herbert and Philmore are true offensive stars for the ApostroCats, and Roberson, Thompson, Lane, Abernathy and Peterman are total gravy. McGarigle, Cofield, Kadela, Roach and Henderson can be differnce-makers. And we also have kickers. I think.

Nameses after the jump.

Well, Michigan has some players too. Sophomore QB Chad Henne isn't as stunning as he was last year, but he's been pretty effective. Soph. back Mike Hart should be returning from injury and seeing his usual playing time. Jason Avant...is a wide receiver. I...just can't speak of him. Sorry. Also look at Manningham and Massaquoi catching balls.

As if that wasn't enough, here's more of the Wolvlatrines:
* More titles? What the? - Mister Simpson (Fr. RB). Yeah, whatever. It's no Sir.
* Mmm. Girl's name - Roger Allison (So. RB),
* Tee hee hee - Steve Breaston (Sr. WR)
* Hey, last names are expensive - Roger Allison, Mike Carl (Sr. S), Brandon Logan (Fr. LB), James Logan (So. DB), William Paul (Jr. DT), Mark Spencer (Jr. P), Charles Stewart (So. CB), Jacob Stewart (Sr. LB), Terrance Taylor (Fr. DT)
Wow. That was way too many. I won't do that one again.
* And one for the NUMBalums! - Barringer, Butler, Ecker, Forcier (ooh), Plummer, Schoonover, Spencer, Taylor,
* And another - Pierre Woods (Sr. LB) Listen, it's close enough.

Go Cats!

2 Homecoming Lists

Halloween costume ideas for Saturday's game (not lazy/lazy):

• Dr. Zoidberg/Philip J. Fry
• Famous NU student Charlton Heston/Future-famous NU student...you
• NU history major (circa 1855)/NU history major (circa 2005)

Events not on your homecoming agenda:

• DM Fundraiser - Raw Chicken Massage @ Norris
• NU-Michigan foosball game.
• Class of 2000/Class of 1905 kickball grudge match
  

Pollognomy!

NU ranked in top 25 nationally for the first time since 2001!

BCS - #21

AP - #21
USA Today - #23
Harris - #22
Anderson and Hester* - #17
Billingsley* - #18
Colley's* - #17
Massey* - #22
Sagarin* - #20
Wolfe* - #19

* - computer ranking

NU 49, MSU 14

Whee! What a fun game to watch. I always like a little of the Brett Basanez show to wake me up on a Saturday morning. As added bonus this week, there was a teaser for the Cats' defense that looked pretty promising. The defensive line and linebackers showed a little more of what we had at times last year, and the secondary stepped up to prevent big MSU plays and make some of their own. Nice.

Kryptonian coach Jon-El Smith should not be too mad at his team. There was no expectation that they could stop the ApostroCats' offensive might. The offense was plagued by turnovers, but for the most part they were not - to borrow a phrase from Smith - "country mistakes." Ok. He never really said that, but it's way funnier than "coaching mistakes."

Here's looking forward to homecoming this weekend and a chance to make up for a couple bad losses in a row to Michigan.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 11.0 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 4-1 = +3 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 7: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 5 (7-0 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 4 (3-1 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 5-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Only his supernatural ability to beat Illinois allowed M-Rob swipe a 3rd consecutive Big Ten weekly honor from Baz's clutches.
Cats' D: Those goalline picks were obviously key. It's very nice that Henderson can do more than just thwack people.
Cats' Special Teams: Had little to do. No miscues is all you can ask for when we don't attempt a FG and each team only punts thrice.

Let's go Cats!

The setup

So, I'm not watching the Cats at home, but this is my new official college football setup. Picture-next-to-picture-next-to-picture, baby. Digital cable in the middle. Standard on the sides.


Pn2Pn2P

MSU Weather Forecast

So, I could just tell you to look back at last week's forecast, but where's the sport in that?

The gameday weather tomorrow should be perfect for football. There are three fronts combining to form a football-shaped (with the laces even!) region of awesome around East Lansing, MI. The temperature will be that of a Wilson (TM) football factory. There will also be, um, football-sized hail. Perfect weather!

MSU Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...there's a road trip guide for this week.
No. Only for when I make the trip.

...that's kind of lame of you.
Meh. I'll do one for U of I, even though I've been down there before. Also, obviously, I'll do one if we should make it to a bowl game.

...John L. Smith is from Krypton.
Coach Smith, or as his parents named him Jon-El gets his super-crying ability from the yellow sun of Earth. So, yes.

...you're excited about the Sox.
le sigh. I'm not super-interested, but I'll feign something other than apathy until the series is over.

Picks after the jump.

...you're picking now.
Damn straight. The line is MSU -12, O/U 71. I've got NU 38, MSU 31.

...you can throw in a bonus pick.
What the hey. Sox in 6. Cumulative runs? Chicago 22, Houston 16.

MSU Preview

Time for another installment in the evenly-matched series between NU and MSU. This mid-season games has frequently been a reflection of NU success in recent seasons, and I believe it will do the same this weekend. Win? Probably get us in the top 25. Loss? Seriously jeopardize any bowl hopes.

This game promises to put the spotlight on two of the nation's best offenses. For MSU, the side is led by junior QB Drew Stanton. The experienced quarterback has hit 14 different receivers this season. Jerramy Scott, Kyle Brown and Matt Trannon lead the WRs. Several players get carries in the backfield, including Javon Ringer, Jehuu Caulcrick, and Jason Teague. Stanton is also a pretty good runner.

The ApostroCats send a good offense of their own. They'll try to keep up the pace that they've set lately against conference opponents. My principle offensive concern is that Tyrell Sutton hasn't had a good road game yet on the ground. I liked the versatility last week, but I think solid rushing will be in order on Saturday.

Names after the jump.

Hey, there's some good names this time!:
* No, not that Jason Teague - Jason Teague (Sr, RB)
* I...just...have no words - Sir Darean Adams (So, DB). I think that's just his first name. I swear.
* Chris Malleo's schoolyard chums - Craig McGovern (Fr*, TE) & Dominic Natale (Fr, QB)
* Sweet sweet girls name - Ryan Allison (Fr, WR)
* Um and Um-er - Kyle Sackrider (So, TE) & Jonal Saint-Dic (Jr, DL)
* And - Alexander, Connor, Cooper, Hoyer, Mayer, Miller, Orr, Pointer, Ringer, Sackrider (wee!), Wheeler
* And! - Ryan Woods

Cats eat Spartans!

NU 34, Purdue 29

Whew. In retrospect, I think I prefer the lose the lead/get it back approach to the almost lose the lead/freak everyone out one. But I'll take this win just as much as last week. It's kind of interesting how we're becoming a more pass-heavy offense. Brett is improving steadily, it seems, and more and more of the offense goes through him. I think it's a great way to play with a senior QB and freshman running back - no matter how much Tyrell acts like he's a veteran.

With the moo and such, we usually look down on Purdue. And rightly so. But you've got to hand it to Joe Tiller. Not only is he not nearly as ugly as Gene Keady, he also put a fire under his quarterback by benching him. Kirsch played much better after sitting due to a lousy 1st half.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 8.3 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 4-1 = +3 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 6: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 4 (6-0 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 3 (2-1 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 4-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Baz may be edging out Tyrell for offensive stardom. I hope they really battle it out.
Cats' D: A more balanced effort from the D, and enough stops in the 1st half to make up for the 2nd.
Cats' Special Teams: Ick on that one kickoff, and on some poor punting. But OK. And ick on missing FGs again.

Let's go Cats!

Purdue Weather Forecast

The forecast for Saturday's game in West Lafayette is: inside.

You'll be inside, watching the game on ESPN2. So, the weather is whatever it is where you'll be watching it. Some potential conditions include:

Smoky (sports bar)
Excessive heat warning (friend's apartment where the radiator's been on for two weeks)
Cold weather watch (my apartment, with big-ass heat-losing windows)
Empty (went to Dyche by mistake)

Don't forget that wearing purple is still required, even though you're watching on TV. Maybe spray paint the TV purple while you're at it.

Purdue Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...NU is once again the homecoming guest for a Big Ten rival.
We are.

...thats seems to happen a lot.
It seems that way, but all the schools are going to have HC between the end of Sept and the end of October, so we'll always have a couple games in there.

...Purdue QB Brandon Kirsch thinks they'll win tomorrow.
I think he does. According to The Exponent, he also thinks they'll win out the rest of the year.

...that really means anything.
Just that he realized he's not supposed to be losing.

...the Purdue paper is really called The Exponent.
It is. And don't go telling me that an exponent is "a person who believes in and promotes the truth or beliefs of an idea or theory." We both know that you made that up.

My pick after the jump.

...you gots the line.
It's Purdue -7.5, O/U 68

...you always pick NU.
Sure do. NU 37, Purdue 27.

Purdue Preview

The first Big Ten road test for the ApostroCats comes this week against Purdue. It's at noon CDT, not 11 as I may have told people. It's going to be a battle in the trenches, like you hear those grizzled NFL vets talk about every Sunday morning. Aw, who I am kidding. It's going to a test of which team's defense can most withstand a battering. NU and the Boilermakers are both real real bad when it comes to defense and pretty damn good on the other side of the ball.

So, what will make the difference? I say time of possession, if (and only if) both teams run the ball often. If it's all passing, then it will be all 2-minute drives and ToP will be meaningless. I think Sutton will have a much better road game that at ASU, and Purdue back Kory Sheets will see a lot of the ball too. QB Brandon Kirsch will look to throw at eight-foot-tall wide-out Kyle Ingraham and WR Dorien "Gray" Bryant.

Names after the jump.

But wait, there's more people on that team!
* No relation; he's thankful - Greg Orton (Fr, WR)
* Un! Creative! - Bryon Williams (Jr, WR), Joe Williams (So, RB), Kyle Williams (Fr, LB), Ray Williams (Sr, CB), Torri Williams (So, S)
* Spoonerism alert - Dan Bick (So, LB)
* Boiler? - Wemer, Turner, Spencer, Sester, Painter, Mossbrucker, Miller x2, Lecklider, Keller, Keglar, Huebner, Huber, Grover, Fincher, Dubler, Baker

MNF Recap

Excellent recap of last night's Steelers-Chargers game.

Are You Ready For Some of John Madden's Super-Fat Face? [tvgasm.com]

NU 51, Wisconsin 48

I'm very happy with the win, obviously. I would have liked it to be 51-34, but I guess I can't have everything. Having Sutton, Basanez and McGarigle on everyone's mind is a good thing, and I'll take it.

Getting more than a handful of votes in the latest polls is also very cool. When do you think the last time we polled ahead of Michigan was? I think it's a pretty important moment, and it ought to be captured for all eternity. Therefore, I will bestow upon it the greatest honor of all; I will name a sandwich after it.

From now on a chicken and mozzarella sandwich on honey white bread shall be known as the Polled Ahead of Michigan sandwich.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 10.0 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 2-2 = 0 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 5: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 3 (5-0 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 2 (1-1 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 3-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Probably the best I've seen us play. Sutton remains my football boyfriend.
Cats' D: Same problem as last week, with few 2nd half stops. McGarigle got some nice recognition.
Cats' Special Teams: Interesting kicking strategy. Seemed to work, but I would like to know if Howells can kick for distance anymore. (Yes, I know it was Villarreal kicking off.)

Let's go Cats!

Wisconsin Weather Forecast

Tomorrow's weather at Dyche will be soooooo cold...if you're a freshman from SoCal, and you've totally read about "winter." Well, I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news and all, but...um...No, I can't do it. Not while you're giving me those puppy dog eyes. You're right; 50 is really very cold. It doesn't usually get this cold here all year, so your linen jacket with the polyesther lining will be all you'll ever need. In fact, wear it to the game and the Badgers will be blinded by your style and whitened teeth.

Cats win!

Wisconsin Whether Report

Say Josh, tell us whether...

...you printed up fresh rosters and depth charts for this game.
I sure enough did.

...there are any changes on the depth chart.
Nothing really, except that Dious and Smith moved up to first string. I expect we'll see most of the defensive backs getting time.

...NU has played Wisconsin much, you know, historically.
This is the 91st meeting with the Badgers. It's our oldest Big Ten rivalry, although we've played more games against Illannoy.

...that means we've had plenty of time to kick their fight song's ass.
Here it is, off the top of my head. Feel free to correct me.

More after the jump.


Aw Wisconsin, poor Wisconsin
Party school of shame
You would enjoy academics
But you lack the brains

Aw Wisconsin, poor Wisconsin
Drink yourselves insane
Drink! For your Badgers will get trashed this game
Go Cats!

...you've got the line...
I've got Wisconsin -7, O/U 60.5

...and a pick
I'm all about NU 21, Wisconsin 17.

Wisconsin Preview

Back from a bye week, the Cats and I are ready (each in our own special way) to take on the Badgers from the grating white north. NU will look to keep up the offensive output that it's had for most of the year. It won't be easy against a pretty good rush defense from Wisconsin. That defense hasn't always stood the test: Bowling Green put up 42 points in week 1 and Michigan ran for nearly 150 yards in a loss at Camp Tony Randall.

Yards and points will be key for the ApostroCats, because they may have to keep pace with Wisconsin's own potent offense. Junior running back Brian Calhoun (#2) is leading the nation in scoring with 10 TDs and is 3rd with 727 rushing yards. He's added 127 receiving yards from QB John Stocco (#7). Stocco, a junior in his second season as starter, has favored senior WR Brandon Williams (#1). Williams will look to follow up on his impressive performance against Indiana last week.

More after the jump.

Saturday's game in Evanston is being played under the shadow of a recent controversy involving Wisconsin. Centuries-old documents have surfaced that indicate the Badger State may not even be a state at all. It appears that the land that makes up WisconsMarin was mearly cast-off area from nearby Illinois, Michigan and Minnesota. In the early nineteenth century, those three territories ceded some border land to contain the blooming Canadian pornographic wood-carving industry. In the mid-1800s, with help from Canada, the region was closed off to prevent the perversion from spreading. Sadly, this discretization confused with with statehood by the badger overlords. Modern commentators believe the entire state education system may be based on confusion or even fraud and the schools should be dissolved. The NCAA will allow the Badgers to continue to play football until this is resolved conclusively.

Since the game is happening, you'll wanna know who's playing, huh?
*Brother against brother (well, not against): Marcus Randel El (WR, brother or Antwaan) & Paul Standring (P, brother of J.J.)
* I hardly even know 'im: Travis Beckum (Fr, LB)
* Or 'er: Butler, Carter, Cooper, Fischer, Foster, Holzbauer, Orr, Rentmeester, Schober, Sherer, Stellmacher, Walker, Walker, Weininger.

Cats eat Badgers!

Best birthday gift ever

I just received a birthday gift from my aunt and uncle. It is an Eagles santa hat. I'll wait while you get up off the floor.

An open letter

Dear Law & Order circa 1999,

If you want a shocking she's-not-my-sister-she's-my-daughter twist, you're going to have to be more careful so I don't figure it out too soon. I'm thinking of "Merger," half-way through which the victim's sister - or so I am meant to think! - is mentioned to have been diagnosed with "PPD." Now, I know that that could be paranoid personality disorder. Unfortunately for your big reveal, I thought of postpartum depression. I was like, "But where's the child? Who could it be?" Sorry to ruin your surprise. Maybe she didn't have to be that crazy, you know? She was on like 10 medications for other things before you mentioned the Prozac. Just saying.

Thanks for your time.

Sincerely,
Josh Eats Birds

Bye Week Predictions

The ApostroCats get a bye this week, and I think it's probably a good time. Another year, I might rather get a break between the Purdue and MSU road games, but we need to regroup after last weeks icky loss. I'm gonna take the break win the Cats, so this will be the only football post until next week. I'll do a bunch of predictions, and we'll see if I have any clue at all.

Check out how my predictions were. Hint: awesome. Well, how about 4-3 picking winners.

More after the jump.

Back by personal demand:
Around the Country in 80 Words! Starting.......now!
Michigan @ MSU: 'Rines not yet on track, lose to 'Tans, 37-24. Michigan 34-31
Indiana @ Wisconsin: Loosiers will miss Green-Ellis, lose conference opener 35-7. Wisconsin 41-24
Illinois @ Iowa: Is firezookagain.com registered yet? Iowa rolls 41-10. Iowa 35-7
Minnesota @ PSU: JoePa prayers unanswered, Maroney and Gophers win 28-14. PSU 44-14
Notre Dame @ Purdue: Purdue plays called by the undead, outscore the dying-chosen offense of ND 41-38. Notre Dame 49-28
USC @ ASU: Trojans take the heat like pros, 38-14. USC 38-28
Eagles @ Chiefs: Chief's defense less vaunted now, Eagles fly 24-10. Eagles 37-31

PSU 34, NU 29

So close, but yet no defense. This is also the third game out of four in which our offense has stalled in the second half. That's gonna be bad news, since I don't think we'll be jumping out to that many insurmountable leads.

I guess I should also stop carping about giving Sutton the ball. He had 32 carries for 112 yards and two TDs. That's a good day. And I don't think he should get it more than 32 times. So, it's up to the rest of the offense to score when they're supposed to. And that usually means Brett.

Nicely, Joel Howells may be back on track. 5/6 is good day for any kicker, and he set the NU record for points by a kicker and tied the conference record for FGs in a game. Good for him. He deserved that Big Ten Special Teamer of the Week dealie that he got.

More after the jump.


Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 6.0 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 3 - 1 = 2 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 4: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 2
Randy: 2
NU Record: 2-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Not so bad, but it's going to have to be 2000-good to make up for defense.
Cats' D: Good for a half. Bad for a half. Guess which part I like better.
Cats' Special Teams: Cole made a big mistake that may have been a turning point in the game, but Howells is hopefully showing his true form.

Let's go Cats!

PSU Weather Forecast

We're all familiar with the impact that hurricanes have had on sporting events in the southern parts of the country. Combining that with the recent tornado watch in northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern Illinois, the NU and PSU administrative and athletic officials have made a decision regarding this Saturday's contest.

It will be played in a vacuum.

Northwestern's McCormick School of Engineering and Applied Science will provide breathing apparatus to all participants. Unfortunately, the tricky ON/OFF design will prove too much for the Lions. The ApostroCats will return the opening kick for a touchdown. Then they will recover every kickoff for an on-side TD against the motionless PSU team.

Cats win, 900-0!

Penn State Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...last week was a tough one for you.
Yeah, it was. I made a lot of mistakes, and I really let the team down.

...you think the loss was your fault?
Well, I missed a lot of my superstitions routine.

...you're back on the ball this week.
Definitely. I'm as close as possible to Ohio and NIU conditions.

More after the jump, including my pick for the game.

...Penn State LB Dan Connor will be back this week.
I think so. Paterno's comments on the matter were...uninformative.

...there was reason to believe he wouldn't play.
Apparently he made some threatening or harassing phone calls. I don't really know the nature of the calls.

...there's a "your mom called" joke in there.
How about...Hey Joe Paterno, Dan Connor called! He said [heavy breathing]!

...you've got a pick.
I'm going NU 24, PSU 14.

Non-football claptrap!

PuckUpdate has the NHL's rejected slogans!

My NHL [PuckUpdate]

Penn State Preview

OK. Time to get right back on the horse. That game last week was brutal, but it's good to be back home. It's Penn State week, and what would that be without me calling for Joe Paterno to retire. If you've been following my football ramblings, you know that I think JoePa must Go(Pa). He's certainly earned a farewell lap, a la Gene Keady, so he can get hugs and cigar boxes and ovations, but he's gotta be gone.

Looking to the Penn State players, I forsee two important parts of the game: Stopping Michael Robinson and overcoming the Lions' rush defense. So, first things first.

Michael Robinson is PSU's starting QB, and big play run/pass threat. He's the 2nd leading rusher on the team, behind Tony Hunt. In the past, he has been a target on the other end of the passing game, so don't be surprised to see him in motion with Anthony Morelli under center. The Cats can contain him with strong LB play and keep small gains from becoming big gains.

The PSU defense has been good so far this year. They've held opponents under 75 yds rushing per game. They've racked up 12 sacks in 3 games. We'll need to establish the rushing game that their non-conference opponents couldn't. I think Tyrell Sutton has that ability, and Brandon Roberson will probably see a share of the backfield.

More after the jump.

Who else to look for:
* Tamba Hali - no joke. Fun name, good player (Sr, DE)
* Kelly is a girl's name - Kevin Kelly (Fr, K)
* ExtRa Caps = ExTra FuN - BranDon Snow (Jr, RB)
* Umm. 'Err - Butler, Connor, Ganter, Kilmer, Lawlor, Ohmberger, Ridenhour

Keys to a Cats win:
1. Tyrell, this is the football. Football, Tyrell. Remember each other?
2. Contain Robinson with minimal commitment (1-2 guys)
3. Big plays, early in game if possible.

For entertainment purposes only:
The line I'm seeing is PSU -7.5, O/U 50.5.

GO CATS!

Joe Pa Press Conference

Before I get into the Penn State preview, I wanted to point out Joe Paterno's press conference. It just stands alone, I think.

Press Conference[GoPSUSports.com]

More on the ASU trip

I forgot to mention that the text-2-jumbotron thing was totally not going in Sun Devil Stadium on Saturday. They handed out cards with the number, and we sent a couple of messages - "Go Cats!" "Tyrell is God." - but no messages showed up anywhere in the stadium. Stupid ASU.

ASU 52, NU 21

Another lame game. There seems to be at least one a year, so we can just hope that this was the one and only for 2005. Giving up 773 yards is really pretty amazing. I think ASU deserves a bunch of the credit for that.

The road tripping went well. Lots of alums, most notably Michael Wilbon, J.A. Adande and myself. Wilbon will be getting a brand spanking new NUMB Tenors jersey which he claims he'll wear on the air for PTI. Wheee!

ASU also deserves a lot of credit for having nice people who were great to us after the game. The worst abuse we got was "You guys are so smart!" So those folks were all right by me.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 6.2 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 1 - 1 = 0 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 3:
Josh: 2
Randy: 1
NU Record: 2-1

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: I don't know why Tyrell only got a couple handfuls of touches. I think he maybe froze up under the lights far away from home. The solution is more touches.
Cats' D: Scary thing? The coverage was not bad. The pressure could have been worse. Yeah.
Cats' Special Teams: Cole is still looking good, and Howells has a leg. I think Howells deserves more confidence from the coaches.

Let's go Cats!

Look out! She's got a veil!

So, I thought the wedding was a pretty awesome success. It did make me think about a potential horror film. The Weddening...

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the altar...
"Oh my God! She's got a knife!"
"You schmuck, that's for the cake."
"Oh."

And then you die from a septic paper cut that you don't even remember getting.

Hollywood? You've got my number.

Brk rt thru tht ln

Send text messages to the jumbotron at ASU! Here's an article! [azcentral.com]

Trying to find the number...

ASU Weather Forecast

Two, two, two forecasts in one this week.

For those of you going to Tempe with me, get ready to melt. Projected high is 100. Degrees. Also the number of points scored by the winning team.

For those staying in or around Chicago, you'll be glued to your radios since there's no TV on this game. So, the forecast calls for lots of people with "Sony" and "Radio Shack" imprinted backwards on their faces. Prepare yourself accordingly.

ASU Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...there's been any late-breaking news on the ASU team.
Not that I've seen. But, I did find an interesting bit of info that, in retrospect, I should have been watching all along.

...you're talking about the Sagarin ratings.
It's the Sagarin ratings! The ApostroCats are ranked 46 and ASU is 51. Playing at home hurts your rating (I think) but both teams have played all home games up to this point.

...that's like totally guaranteeing a win.
I'm fairly certain it is. Stupid freaking Jeff Sagarin. Trying to jinx the Cats like that!

...you're going to keep these shorter, under the new roof here.
Yeah, I think so. Shorter probably equals easier to read. I'll post extra things if I need to.

...you're gonna pick NU despite the heavy favoring of ASU by the odds-makers.
I sure am. I'll try to be reasonable though. How about NU 38, ASU 31.

ApostroCats

Heh. I forgot that I used to call them that until I started posting the archives of the 2003 and 2004 seasons. I'll have to use it some more now.

ASU Road Trip Guide

Saturday is the first NU road game of the season, and it's also my first road trip of the year. What a pleasant coincidence. I know how people have come to rely on my road trip guides, but I should mention a key point. I only provide guides for games that I'm going to. Sorry if you're going to Columbus or East Lansing this year. Not me. You're on your own there.

But I am going to Tempe, so here's what you (and I) will need to know:

* How do I get there? or Is Arizona the one on the left or the right?
Your best bet is probably to fly. Most professional pilots know to look for Bank One Ballpark and land in that state. You'll fly into Phoenix and Tempe is basically adjacent to Phoenix. Sun Devil Stadium is a few miles from the airport.

Read more after the jump.

* Hotel life on the road.
There are plenty of hotel options in and around Tempe. As a vacation locale as well as a college city, you'll have your pick of lodging there. The most important part, especially if you're supersticious about gameday routines, will be to make your hotel room as homey as possible. I suggest the following items:
- NU Flag to hang in your window
- Fuzzy purple wildcat slippers
- Grass patch of OSU (2004) and Michigan (2000) game-field turf
- Screen door
- "Tempur-Pedic" mattress

* What the hell time is it here anyway?
Travelling to AZ has a unique problem that it shares with that road trip to Indiana two years ago. They're all screwy about the time zones. Arizona is on Mountain Standard Time because they hate the environment and think it's ok to go wasting daylight all willy-nilly. If that makes you as hot-under-the-collar as it does me, try pretending you're in California. The time is just like Pacific Daylight Time plus you can be all ditzy and pretend you're a native Californian. Zing!

So, just for clarity, the game starts at 7pm Mountain Stupid Time or Pacific Delicious Time.

See y'all in Tempe!

Look Ma! No Pubweb!

Hey there! I'm freeing myself of the Northwestern domain for the sake of whenever I stop working there. I'm mostly just gonna use this for my NU football notebook, but maybe I'll get inspired in the off-season too. So, welcome and come back soon.

I'm gonna start migrating posts from the old notebook. Starting with the 2005 season, and working backward.

ASU Preview

Now it's time to say "goodbye"
to our dormitory
A-S-U R-O-A -D G-A-M-E

That's right, it's the Cats' first road contest of the season. The ASU Sun Devils (yeah, don't worry, we'll deal with that later) will be a test for the Wildcats. After winning a laugher against Temple, #18/22 ASU lost a close game to then #5 LSU (now #3). ASU is led by junior QB Sam Keller. He seems to be pretty good, with 8 TDs and 2 picks through the first two games. His prime target is senior wide-out Derek Hagan. The ASU defense is nothing special, but probably adequate when paired with their offense. They actually gave up 16 points in that win over Temple, I mean come on. In fact, they've given up exactly as many points as NU's defense has. Just saying.

More after the jump.

But what's really important to know about ASU? What the damn hell is a Sun Devil? Well, I'm sure sundevils.com will have the answer:

It was the summer of 1946 when someone uttered those words for the first time. But who? That's a question that has haunted Arizona State University historians for years.

Good one ASU. You have no idea what your mascot is, do you? Just admit it! They do know that a former Disney animator designed the Sparky figure. According to Wikipedia, he may have designed the devil in Walt Disney's image to spite him for being fired. That's a mascot a school can be proud of right there!

Speaking of other blights on the Tempe landscape,
* Girls's names's: Jesse Ainsworth (Jr, K), Chad Lindsay (Fr, LB)
* Oh shut up, you laughed too: Rodney Cox (So, CB)
* But she and I have only just met: Baker, Carpenter, Keller, Merriweather, Miller (x3), Nenaber, Oliver, Palmer

Keys to a Cats win:
1. Score more at least 5 times
2. Keep Keller below 300 yds passing
3. Win possession time battle *ahem*TyrellSutton*ahem*

For entertainment purposes only:
The early line this week is ASU -15.5 with an O/U 64.

GO CATS!

NU 38, NIU 37

Let me just say that I think if we score 38 points in each game this season we will win quite a few. I would really rather win more like last week and less like this week, but I'll take whatever we can get. I think a lot of people would agree on those opinions.

I think a lot of people would also agree that Tyrell Sutton is a freaking stud. He's now (after two weeks, I know, but still) tied for 4th in the nation in rushing and tied for 1st in total scoring. On a related note, there's a kicker who's just behind him with 11 FGs and 1 PAT. What the hell? What team kicks 11 FGs in two games and only scores 1 touchdown?! Of course Wolfe is probably a bigger stud. Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern will probably be one of the top rushing teams by the end of the season.

Baz didn't have a big game, but he was ok. No picks is good, and his fumble didn't do any harm. Luckily, Sutton was everywhere you want to be. I would like to see NU get closer to 300 yards passing per game. That would be nice.

More after the jump.

I'm gonna keep this short, because I need to do 4 other entries this week, and I need to get them done by Friday morning. See y'all real soon!

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 6.8 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 2 - 1 = 1 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 2:
Josh: 2
Randy: 1
NU Record: 2-0

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Tyrell Sutton? So sweet. But I would like to see more passing, like last week. I'll take the 200+ rushing yards though, don't get me wrong.
Cats' D: Pretty good pressure, but no sacks. If we can solidify the secondary, it would free up the LBs to blitz more.
Cats' Special Teams: Great return (i.e. Cole's TD) but the kicking side needs to improve still.

Let's go Cats!

NIU Weather Forecast

Well, the "actual" forecast calls for a hot one tomorrow at Dyche. I'm pretty sure the exact words were "hot as an oven." The weatherman also said something about "the whole shack shimm[ying]." I don't know what's up with that, but I do know from ovens. And if we're talking ovens, that can only mean one thing: Shrinky Dinks!

The Cats will take the field in Shrink- (and Dink-) resistant unis, but Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern will unwittingly be made entirely of plastic. The shrinkage and melty-ness will cause them to stick to the bottoms of the NU players' shoes, but not enough to slow them down.

Cats win!

NIU Whether Report

Say, Josh, tell me whether...

...there's any kind of promotion going on at Dyche this weekend.
I believe it is Heroe's Day. Also Band Day. Also Salute to Midwest Football Day. & Wildcat Kids' Club Day. Also possibly Pacific Blue Heron Day, Bring a Salamander to the Game Day, & Beat Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern SaturDay.

...that band day includes the Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern band.
I have heard that it does.

...you've ever heard their fight song.
Well, I guess I heard it about 5 years ago - the last time we played them. But, I had to get a refresher.

...it rocks, or totally rocks.
It totally...hey!.. who let that Huskie in here. Get 'im boys!

Sorry about that, Josh.
...it sucks, or totally sucks.
Oh, it's somewhere between Forward Falcons and Indiana, Our Indiana.

...you've prepared a parody.
Indeed I have. Ahem.

Huskies, you're only puppies
Our neighbors through and through
Puppies, go home you puppies
Back to DeKalb with you
Northern, but not NorthWESTern
The difference is true
You can't get in here
And you can't win here
A sure win for NU!

...a pick, if you please.
Aw shucks. How 'bouts NU 35-27 NIU.

NIU Preview

After a pretty solid start to the season, the Wildcats are home again this week to take on in-state rival Northern Illinois. OK, I'm just gonna say right here that every time I type "Northern," it comes out like this "Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern." So I may as well just make a macro for that and go with it. Another disclaimer before we begin. Two of my relatives went to Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern Illinois. But they root for NU anyway. Actually, if we got one of those A House Divided flags it would just be Northwestern with ISU, EIU, WIU and Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern Illinois University in (purple) pencil on the tag on the back.

On with the show! Both the Cats and the Huskies had good offensive numbers last week. NU's 356 passing yards and 194 rushing yards were good for a win, while Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern's 200 passing and 211 rushing didn't equal many points against Michigan in a loss. Both offenses will be concentrating on improving the lesser of those two numbers (rushing for the Cats, passing for the Huskies) without sacrificing anything. Northwestern has no major changes in its offensive lineup. Gerard Hamlett has moved past Omar Conteh to third on the RB and 1st on the kick return depth charts. Brandon Roberson is still listed as starting RB, but he is day-to-day with an ankle injury, as are Mark Filmore (ankle) and Kim Thompson (finger.) I expect all to play, with the possible exception of Roberson if Sutton is running well again.

On the other side of the ball, the stats from last week become less meaningful. Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern went up against some quality offense and did not hold up well. The Wildcats contained (for the most part) a pretty bad offense from Ohio. I expect that both teams will improve some over last week. The numbers won't tell the story though. On defense, this week it will be about stopping big plays (particularly for the Cats D-line and LBs).Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern RB duo of Garrett Wolfe and A.J. Harris cannot be allowed too many big broken runs.

So, I just mentioned the RB tandem from Northwes(delete)(delete)(delete)ern. They are QBed by Phil Horvath who throws to Wolfe and Harris as well as TE Jake Nordin about as often as the wideouts. The more you know. Here are some other guys to watch for.

* I highly doubt it: Evans Adonis (Fr, WR)
* Two first names: Josh Allen (Fr, CB), Ira Barry (So, LB), Tom Kelly (Fr, TE), Javan Lee (Sr, LB), Vincent Matthew (Fr, CB), Andre Morris (Jr, CB) It doesn't stop! Victor Scott, Cole Spencer, Martin Wilson!
* Not that Matt Biondi: Matt Biondi (So, OG)
* Girls names!: Tom Kelly
* So there was this guy in my high school and his name was hard to pronounce. We called him Alphabet Alphabet: Bill Ikegwuonwu, David Koronkiewicz.
* I hardly even know 'er!: Turner, Streeter, Spencer, Schroeder, Keller, Carter

Keys to a Cats win:
1. Keep up passing attack (6.5+ yds/att)
2. Hold Wolfe and Harris below 130 yds combined
3. Improve red-zone scoring percentage. 75% or higher

For entertainment purposes only:
The line this week is NU -2.5 with an O/U 57.5.


GO CATS!

NU 38, Ohio 14

So, all in all, I'd say that was a pretty sweet opener, but in my mind it was one of two big games on Saturday. The Mens National Team 2-0 victory over Mexico to become the first team from CONCACAF to qualify for Germany 2006 was pretty huge too. Let us review:

NU got off to a hot start with 31 points in the 1st half - 28 in the 2nd quarter. That pretty much iced it right there, because the 1st string defense did a nice job stopping both the run and pass from Ohio. Giving the 2nd stringers on both sides of the ball a lot of game experience was a good way to finish the game. CJ Bacher looked good, but I would have liked to see more of Omar Conteh.

The US and Mexico got off to a slow start in Columbus. Neither side had any real shots in the first half. In the 2nd, two goals within 5 minutes of each other put the US up for good. Mexico was clearly hoping for a scoreless draw (which would have qualified them) and had no push toward goal.

NU got excellent individual performances. Basanez' 353 passing yards quickly moved hime among the best in the nation. His Freshman RB Tyrell Sutton had 104 yards rushing in his debut, and he made a great first impression. Sutton had good quick moves and a nose for first downs and TDs. Note on Sutton: Full name is Tyrell DelShawn Sutton. I like the TD in there. It speaks to me.

The US got excellent individual play too. Midfielder DaMarcus Beasley took quite a beating as he continued his return from injury. He put pressure on the Mexican backline with his speed and put in the 2nd goal to secure the win. Young defender Oguchi Onyewu had a great game stiffling striker Jared Borguetti with a combination of physical play and intelligent positioning.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 9.5 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 3 - 3 = 0 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 1:
Josh: 1
Randy: 0
NU Record: 1-0

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: I look forward to hearing "Basanez and Sutton" all year, but I totally love nine receiver with at least one catch.
MNT O: We hear a lot about Donovan and McBride (rightly so), but I totally love DaMarcus Beasley.
Cats' D: Fewer big plays is good. Got to keep improving to succeed in the conference.
MNT D: Onyewu and Hejduk are looking good, but any more injuries in the back could be a killer.
Cats' Special Teams: Ryan Pederson's punts were OK. Howells' 1-3 FGing was OK for now. I give them a Meh+.
MNT GK: Kasey Keller is one of the best GK in the world. He'll get some well-deserved rest from the national team for a while. I give him a WooHoo-.

Let's go Cats!

Ohio Weather Forecast

One word: Dogs.

You've heard of "raining cats and dogs." Well, this Saturday the forecast apprently calls for just dogs. Even this experienced meteorognomer had to go back to some pretty ancient meteorognomy texts to see what that's all about. My ruin-translation skillz are not quite as mad as they used to be, but I think this is what we'll be dealing with at Dyche tomorrow around mid-day.

Whensoever it comes to pass that two incarnations of the Cat-animal pursue a single porcine quarry, this shall be deamed an afront to the natural Order of Things. Further, if one Cat-animal is of the Wild, it shall have the true Advantage in the square-off. It shall take notlong for the Wild to prevail against the Bob* cat'. After victory, the Wild-cat' will call forth its Dog (sometimes Badger) servants to chase off the Bob. If these lower, servile creatures are not native to the Land, elder Cat-animals will take to ridding the Bob using Horn and Drum.

Huh. You learn something new every day, I guess. Cats win!

Ohio Whether Report

Say, Josh, tell me whether...

...you've memorized the Wildcat roster by name, number and position yet.
Sure did. Go ahead and ask me anything.

...you know who #38 is.
Nick Roach. Pick a hard one.

...you know what Tyrell Sutton's number is.
19.

...you just cheated on that one.
No. Yes. I'll cram a little more before Saturday, I promise.

...Ohio's fight song is worth mentioning.
Well, not really, but you already did. What's your problem?

...you've got a good nickname for new Ohio coach Franch Solich.
So far I'm stumped. This is a bad sign for me.

...you want to take a minute and think about that some more.
How about Frank Solich "en-covered that he caught some kind of horrible lichen-transmitted disease." or Frank Solich "thyology professor is very ol', because Frank himself is so ol' and studied ichthyology long ago." The first one probably rolls better off the tongue, I think.

...you ever found the over/under for the game.
Still can't find one. I usually make my pick before I look at the odds anyway. I'm picking NU 31 - 14. If you were hit in the head, and you therefore use my picks to bet, I can't help you on the O/U.

Ohio Preview

Welcome back to another season of Northwestern football! Welcome back, additionally, to another season of my incoherent ramblings about Northwestern football! This year looks like it could be a long one (and unfortunately I don't mean that it won't end until early January.) But, for now, I refuse to be fully depressed about the prospects for 2005 until I at least see some action on the field. So, a little housekeeping and then on with the show.

Here's how it works. Before each game I'll post a preview, hopefully before Thursday afternoon. Then by Friday afternoon I'll have the whether report. Sometime before gametime on Saturday I'll have the weather report up. If a game gets moved from Saturday, all that stuff shifts appropriately. The previews (like this one!) tell you everything you need to know about the opposition de la semaine and whatever else I think is important or amusing.

The Cats' first test this season is at home against the Ohio University Bobcats. Last year, Ohio went 4-7 overall, and 2-6 in the MAC. Their four wins were over a few hapless teams: VMI, Buffalo, Kentucky and UCF. Cumulative 2004 record of those four teams? 4-40. So, you'd think this is a cupcake for NU. Well, maybe. But the Bobcats are coached by newly hired Frank Solich. That's formerly-of-Nebraska Frank Solich. I didn't want to mention the Alamo Bowl, but it looks like I just did. So let's just leave it at that.

Ohio has a handful of returning starters on either side of the ball. An experienced backup moving in to start at QB. Blah blah blah. They've been sucky for several years, and who knows if a new coach can change all that in an off-season. So I'm a lot more excited to see if they have funny names...

* Generic girls' names: Matron Church (Jr, LB) & Brandon Maiden (Fr, WR)
* Specific girl's name!: Thomas Christy (Sr, TE)
* I got nothing, but isn't this an awesome name for a town: Nanty-Glo, PA - Todd Koening (So, RB)
* I hardly even know 'er!: Lasher (good one!), Miller (x3), Schussler, & Turner

Keys to a Cats win:
1. 6.5+ yards/pass attempt.
2. 125 total yards rushing.
3. Better-than-Ohio kicking (FGs, PATs, kickoffs, punts)

For entertainment purposes only:
The line I've seen for this game is NU -14 1/2. I haven't seen an O/U yet, but I'm gonna guess 45. I'll update here or in the whether if I see otherwise.


GO CATS!