Michigan 33, NU 17

Well, compared to our two previous losses to Michigan, this wasn't so bad. I know it feels pretty lousy, but in a little bit of hindsight I'm starting to think it was just a game between two good teams and 1 had a much better night. I don't believe that in 10 rematches we would be below 100 yards rushing that often. Or that we would miss so many tackles every game.

Or, hopefully, that Baz would seem to make so many bad reads. It's not the two picks that get me. I don't think we believed he'd go the whole season throwing for 300 yards each game and only throw one interception. Hoped? Yes. Believed? Nah. The problem was that his much-touted vision was not with him tonight. Maybe the picks shook him up. Seems plausible, but he was Zak Kustok circa 2001: too many bad decisions among otherwise good play.

Before the StatWatch, as much as it pains me, kudos to Lloyd Carr and the Michigan offensive game plan. They kept our secondary off balance with major shifts before each play (with no procedure penalties) and our best defenders (Roach and McGarigle) from killing them by throwing long outside passes.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 6.7 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 4-3 = +1 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 8: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 6 (7-1 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 5 (3-2 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 5-3

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Too bad we couldn't move the ball on the ground. It would have been the difference.
Cats' D: Not that bad, by our standards, but we need a little more technique to go with hard hitting.
Cats' Special Teams: Kickoffs could have been better. A FG was nice to see too.

Let's go Cats!

Eat a sandwich!

Nice little quote from Coach Walker about Baz:

"He has become a better physical specimen," Walker said on the ADT Coaches' Spotlight Show on Tuesday. "I let him wear short-sleeved shirts. It used to be turtlenecks and long-sleeved shirts. I told him, 'Eat a sandwich and get in the weight room.'"

found it on...Ivan Maisel [ESPN.com]

Responsible Spam

Too too awesome.

Responsible Spam [McSweeney's]

Michigan Weather Forecast

The conditions during Saturday evening's game will be influenced by two colliding fronts. The first, a homecoming front, will bring in loads of purple sweatshirts and senior citizens (Class of 1995? Damn old, man.) The second, a halloween front, will produce pimps and hos and tablecloth ghosts.

So, the forecast calls for purple tablecloth ghosts and elderly pimps and hos. This combination will prove to be too scary for the Wolvlatrines.

Cats Win!

p.s. It's scaaaaaaaary!

Michigan Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...it's nice to be heading back to Dyche for NU football.
Yeah, it really really is.

...there's something wrong with watching at Tom's house.
No no no. I just don't think his neighbors like being told to pray for death

...anyone likes that.
Well, Steve Breaston does. Try it out tomorrow.

...you've got your homecoming all planned out.
It goes a little something like this: play, watch, drink. eat, drink, play, watch, play, watch, drink.

...you've got fight song lyrics for us.
I hope we won't be hearing this too much, but I'm providing Dr. Thompson's lyrics from the NUMBalum newsletter. Your milage may vary.

What is a victors valiant?
Who are the conquering heroes?
Fail, fail you michigan,
You must be second best!

MICE from the wolverine state
CATS have decided your fate
Fail, fail you michigan,
The armpit of the west.

Picks after the jump.

...we can really win.
Hell yes.

...you're picking us to win.
Nice to see some new people here. The line is Michigan -3, O/U 62. I've got NU 42, Michigan 28.

Michigan Preview

This week's matchup with Michigan is certainly intriguing and it is deservedly garnering national attention. Obviously, the Cats are the higher-ranked team and have the home field and homecoming advantages in their favor. A look at the stats and and a little memory reveals that NU has an edge in offensive numbers and a recent history of stepping up the defense for homecoming. BUT. This is Michigan, and that always seems to be a meaningful fact for us. When's the last time we demolished Michigan? Not in the last 10 meetings anyway. And you can expect to see some "maize" in the stands.

That doesn't mean I don't thinke we'll win. I always think we're gonna win, and lately I've been right a little. Baz, Sutton, Herbert and Philmore are true offensive stars for the ApostroCats, and Roberson, Thompson, Lane, Abernathy and Peterman are total gravy. McGarigle, Cofield, Kadela, Roach and Henderson can be differnce-makers. And we also have kickers. I think.

Nameses after the jump.

Well, Michigan has some players too. Sophomore QB Chad Henne isn't as stunning as he was last year, but he's been pretty effective. Soph. back Mike Hart should be returning from injury and seeing his usual playing time. Jason Avant...is a wide receiver. I...just can't speak of him. Sorry. Also look at Manningham and Massaquoi catching balls.

As if that wasn't enough, here's more of the Wolvlatrines:
* More titles? What the? - Mister Simpson (Fr. RB). Yeah, whatever. It's no Sir.
* Mmm. Girl's name - Roger Allison (So. RB),
* Tee hee hee - Steve Breaston (Sr. WR)
* Hey, last names are expensive - Roger Allison, Mike Carl (Sr. S), Brandon Logan (Fr. LB), James Logan (So. DB), William Paul (Jr. DT), Mark Spencer (Jr. P), Charles Stewart (So. CB), Jacob Stewart (Sr. LB), Terrance Taylor (Fr. DT)
Wow. That was way too many. I won't do that one again.
* And one for the NUMBalums! - Barringer, Butler, Ecker, Forcier (ooh), Plummer, Schoonover, Spencer, Taylor,
* And another - Pierre Woods (Sr. LB) Listen, it's close enough.

Go Cats!

2 Homecoming Lists

Halloween costume ideas for Saturday's game (not lazy/lazy):

• Dr. Zoidberg/Philip J. Fry
• Famous NU student Charlton Heston/Future-famous NU student...you
• NU history major (circa 1855)/NU history major (circa 2005)

Events not on your homecoming agenda:

• DM Fundraiser - Raw Chicken Massage @ Norris
• NU-Michigan foosball game.
• Class of 2000/Class of 1905 kickball grudge match
  

Pollognomy!

NU ranked in top 25 nationally for the first time since 2001!

BCS - #21

AP - #21
USA Today - #23
Harris - #22
Anderson and Hester* - #17
Billingsley* - #18
Colley's* - #17
Massey* - #22
Sagarin* - #20
Wolfe* - #19

* - computer ranking

NU 49, MSU 14

Whee! What a fun game to watch. I always like a little of the Brett Basanez show to wake me up on a Saturday morning. As added bonus this week, there was a teaser for the Cats' defense that looked pretty promising. The defensive line and linebackers showed a little more of what we had at times last year, and the secondary stepped up to prevent big MSU plays and make some of their own. Nice.

Kryptonian coach Jon-El Smith should not be too mad at his team. There was no expectation that they could stop the ApostroCats' offensive might. The offense was plagued by turnovers, but for the most part they were not - to borrow a phrase from Smith - "country mistakes." Ok. He never really said that, but it's way funnier than "coaching mistakes."

Here's looking forward to homecoming this weekend and a chance to make up for a couple bad losses in a row to Michigan.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 11.0 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 4-1 = +3 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 7: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 5 (7-0 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 4 (3-1 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 5-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Only his supernatural ability to beat Illinois allowed M-Rob swipe a 3rd consecutive Big Ten weekly honor from Baz's clutches.
Cats' D: Those goalline picks were obviously key. It's very nice that Henderson can do more than just thwack people.
Cats' Special Teams: Had little to do. No miscues is all you can ask for when we don't attempt a FG and each team only punts thrice.

Let's go Cats!

The setup

So, I'm not watching the Cats at home, but this is my new official college football setup. Picture-next-to-picture-next-to-picture, baby. Digital cable in the middle. Standard on the sides.


Pn2Pn2P

MSU Weather Forecast

So, I could just tell you to look back at last week's forecast, but where's the sport in that?

The gameday weather tomorrow should be perfect for football. There are three fronts combining to form a football-shaped (with the laces even!) region of awesome around East Lansing, MI. The temperature will be that of a Wilson (TM) football factory. There will also be, um, football-sized hail. Perfect weather!

MSU Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...there's a road trip guide for this week.
No. Only for when I make the trip.

...that's kind of lame of you.
Meh. I'll do one for U of I, even though I've been down there before. Also, obviously, I'll do one if we should make it to a bowl game.

...John L. Smith is from Krypton.
Coach Smith, or as his parents named him Jon-El gets his super-crying ability from the yellow sun of Earth. So, yes.

...you're excited about the Sox.
le sigh. I'm not super-interested, but I'll feign something other than apathy until the series is over.

Picks after the jump.

...you're picking now.
Damn straight. The line is MSU -12, O/U 71. I've got NU 38, MSU 31.

...you can throw in a bonus pick.
What the hey. Sox in 6. Cumulative runs? Chicago 22, Houston 16.

MSU Preview

Time for another installment in the evenly-matched series between NU and MSU. This mid-season games has frequently been a reflection of NU success in recent seasons, and I believe it will do the same this weekend. Win? Probably get us in the top 25. Loss? Seriously jeopardize any bowl hopes.

This game promises to put the spotlight on two of the nation's best offenses. For MSU, the side is led by junior QB Drew Stanton. The experienced quarterback has hit 14 different receivers this season. Jerramy Scott, Kyle Brown and Matt Trannon lead the WRs. Several players get carries in the backfield, including Javon Ringer, Jehuu Caulcrick, and Jason Teague. Stanton is also a pretty good runner.

The ApostroCats send a good offense of their own. They'll try to keep up the pace that they've set lately against conference opponents. My principle offensive concern is that Tyrell Sutton hasn't had a good road game yet on the ground. I liked the versatility last week, but I think solid rushing will be in order on Saturday.

Names after the jump.

Hey, there's some good names this time!:
* No, not that Jason Teague - Jason Teague (Sr, RB)
* I...just...have no words - Sir Darean Adams (So, DB). I think that's just his first name. I swear.
* Chris Malleo's schoolyard chums - Craig McGovern (Fr*, TE) & Dominic Natale (Fr, QB)
* Sweet sweet girls name - Ryan Allison (Fr, WR)
* Um and Um-er - Kyle Sackrider (So, TE) & Jonal Saint-Dic (Jr, DL)
* And - Alexander, Connor, Cooper, Hoyer, Mayer, Miller, Orr, Pointer, Ringer, Sackrider (wee!), Wheeler
* And! - Ryan Woods

Cats eat Spartans!

NU 34, Purdue 29

Whew. In retrospect, I think I prefer the lose the lead/get it back approach to the almost lose the lead/freak everyone out one. But I'll take this win just as much as last week. It's kind of interesting how we're becoming a more pass-heavy offense. Brett is improving steadily, it seems, and more and more of the offense goes through him. I think it's a great way to play with a senior QB and freshman running back - no matter how much Tyrell acts like he's a veteran.

With the moo and such, we usually look down on Purdue. And rightly so. But you've got to hand it to Joe Tiller. Not only is he not nearly as ugly as Gene Keady, he also put a fire under his quarterback by benching him. Kirsch played much better after sitting due to a lousy 1st half.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 8.3 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 4-1 = +3 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 6: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 4 (6-0 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 3 (2-1 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 4-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Baz may be edging out Tyrell for offensive stardom. I hope they really battle it out.
Cats' D: A more balanced effort from the D, and enough stops in the 1st half to make up for the 2nd.
Cats' Special Teams: Ick on that one kickoff, and on some poor punting. But OK. And ick on missing FGs again.

Let's go Cats!

Purdue Weather Forecast

The forecast for Saturday's game in West Lafayette is: inside.

You'll be inside, watching the game on ESPN2. So, the weather is whatever it is where you'll be watching it. Some potential conditions include:

Smoky (sports bar)
Excessive heat warning (friend's apartment where the radiator's been on for two weeks)
Cold weather watch (my apartment, with big-ass heat-losing windows)
Empty (went to Dyche by mistake)

Don't forget that wearing purple is still required, even though you're watching on TV. Maybe spray paint the TV purple while you're at it.

Purdue Whether Report

Say Josh, tell me whether...

...NU is once again the homecoming guest for a Big Ten rival.
We are.

...thats seems to happen a lot.
It seems that way, but all the schools are going to have HC between the end of Sept and the end of October, so we'll always have a couple games in there.

...Purdue QB Brandon Kirsch thinks they'll win tomorrow.
I think he does. According to The Exponent, he also thinks they'll win out the rest of the year.

...that really means anything.
Just that he realized he's not supposed to be losing.

...the Purdue paper is really called The Exponent.
It is. And don't go telling me that an exponent is "a person who believes in and promotes the truth or beliefs of an idea or theory." We both know that you made that up.

My pick after the jump.

...you gots the line.
It's Purdue -7.5, O/U 68

...you always pick NU.
Sure do. NU 37, Purdue 27.

Purdue Preview

The first Big Ten road test for the ApostroCats comes this week against Purdue. It's at noon CDT, not 11 as I may have told people. It's going to be a battle in the trenches, like you hear those grizzled NFL vets talk about every Sunday morning. Aw, who I am kidding. It's going to a test of which team's defense can most withstand a battering. NU and the Boilermakers are both real real bad when it comes to defense and pretty damn good on the other side of the ball.

So, what will make the difference? I say time of possession, if (and only if) both teams run the ball often. If it's all passing, then it will be all 2-minute drives and ToP will be meaningless. I think Sutton will have a much better road game that at ASU, and Purdue back Kory Sheets will see a lot of the ball too. QB Brandon Kirsch will look to throw at eight-foot-tall wide-out Kyle Ingraham and WR Dorien "Gray" Bryant.

Names after the jump.

But wait, there's more people on that team!
* No relation; he's thankful - Greg Orton (Fr, WR)
* Un! Creative! - Bryon Williams (Jr, WR), Joe Williams (So, RB), Kyle Williams (Fr, LB), Ray Williams (Sr, CB), Torri Williams (So, S)
* Spoonerism alert - Dan Bick (So, LB)
* Boiler? - Wemer, Turner, Spencer, Sester, Painter, Mossbrucker, Miller x2, Lecklider, Keller, Keglar, Huebner, Huber, Grover, Fincher, Dubler, Baker

MNF Recap

Excellent recap of last night's Steelers-Chargers game.

Are You Ready For Some of John Madden's Super-Fat Face? [tvgasm.com]

NU 51, Wisconsin 48

I'm very happy with the win, obviously. I would have liked it to be 51-34, but I guess I can't have everything. Having Sutton, Basanez and McGarigle on everyone's mind is a good thing, and I'll take it.

Getting more than a handful of votes in the latest polls is also very cool. When do you think the last time we polled ahead of Michigan was? I think it's a pretty important moment, and it ought to be captured for all eternity. Therefore, I will bestow upon it the greatest honor of all; I will name a sandwich after it.

From now on a chicken and mozzarella sandwich on honey white bread shall be known as the Polled Ahead of Michigan sandwich.

More after the jump.

Josh's StatWatch vs. Coach Walker's StatWatch
Josh - NU Passing yards/attempt: 10.0 yds/att (better than 6.5 = good)
Walker - NU Turnover margin: 2-2 = 0 (positive = good)

Standings after Game 5: The goal here is to see which of our benchmarks is a better predictor of wins.
Josh: 3 (5-0 predicting individual outcomes)
Randy: 2 (1-1 predicting individual outcomes, 0 turnover margin is not a predictor)
NU Record: 3-2

And
In My Opinion:
Cats' O: Probably the best I've seen us play. Sutton remains my football boyfriend.
Cats' D: Same problem as last week, with few 2nd half stops. McGarigle got some nice recognition.
Cats' Special Teams: Interesting kicking strategy. Seemed to work, but I would like to know if Howells can kick for distance anymore. (Yes, I know it was Villarreal kicking off.)

Let's go Cats!

Wisconsin Weather Forecast

Tomorrow's weather at Dyche will be soooooo cold...if you're a freshman from SoCal, and you've totally read about "winter." Well, I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news and all, but...um...No, I can't do it. Not while you're giving me those puppy dog eyes. You're right; 50 is really very cold. It doesn't usually get this cold here all year, so your linen jacket with the polyesther lining will be all you'll ever need. In fact, wear it to the game and the Badgers will be blinded by your style and whitened teeth.

Cats win!

Wisconsin Whether Report

Say Josh, tell us whether...

...you printed up fresh rosters and depth charts for this game.
I sure enough did.

...there are any changes on the depth chart.
Nothing really, except that Dious and Smith moved up to first string. I expect we'll see most of the defensive backs getting time.

...NU has played Wisconsin much, you know, historically.
This is the 91st meeting with the Badgers. It's our oldest Big Ten rivalry, although we've played more games against Illannoy.

...that means we've had plenty of time to kick their fight song's ass.
Here it is, off the top of my head. Feel free to correct me.

More after the jump.


Aw Wisconsin, poor Wisconsin
Party school of shame
You would enjoy academics
But you lack the brains

Aw Wisconsin, poor Wisconsin
Drink yourselves insane
Drink! For your Badgers will get trashed this game
Go Cats!

...you've got the line...
I've got Wisconsin -7, O/U 60.5

...and a pick
I'm all about NU 21, Wisconsin 17.

Wisconsin Preview

Back from a bye week, the Cats and I are ready (each in our own special way) to take on the Badgers from the grating white north. NU will look to keep up the offensive output that it's had for most of the year. It won't be easy against a pretty good rush defense from Wisconsin. That defense hasn't always stood the test: Bowling Green put up 42 points in week 1 and Michigan ran for nearly 150 yards in a loss at Camp Tony Randall.

Yards and points will be key for the ApostroCats, because they may have to keep pace with Wisconsin's own potent offense. Junior running back Brian Calhoun (#2) is leading the nation in scoring with 10 TDs and is 3rd with 727 rushing yards. He's added 127 receiving yards from QB John Stocco (#7). Stocco, a junior in his second season as starter, has favored senior WR Brandon Williams (#1). Williams will look to follow up on his impressive performance against Indiana last week.

More after the jump.

Saturday's game in Evanston is being played under the shadow of a recent controversy involving Wisconsin. Centuries-old documents have surfaced that indicate the Badger State may not even be a state at all. It appears that the land that makes up WisconsMarin was mearly cast-off area from nearby Illinois, Michigan and Minnesota. In the early nineteenth century, those three territories ceded some border land to contain the blooming Canadian pornographic wood-carving industry. In the mid-1800s, with help from Canada, the region was closed off to prevent the perversion from spreading. Sadly, this discretization confused with with statehood by the badger overlords. Modern commentators believe the entire state education system may be based on confusion or even fraud and the schools should be dissolved. The NCAA will allow the Badgers to continue to play football until this is resolved conclusively.

Since the game is happening, you'll wanna know who's playing, huh?
*Brother against brother (well, not against): Marcus Randel El (WR, brother or Antwaan) & Paul Standring (P, brother of J.J.)
* I hardly even know 'im: Travis Beckum (Fr, LB)
* Or 'er: Butler, Carter, Cooper, Fischer, Foster, Holzbauer, Orr, Rentmeester, Schober, Sherer, Stellmacher, Walker, Walker, Weininger.

Cats eat Badgers!

Best birthday gift ever

I just received a birthday gift from my aunt and uncle. It is an Eagles santa hat. I'll wait while you get up off the floor.

An open letter

Dear Law & Order circa 1999,

If you want a shocking she's-not-my-sister-she's-my-daughter twist, you're going to have to be more careful so I don't figure it out too soon. I'm thinking of "Merger," half-way through which the victim's sister - or so I am meant to think! - is mentioned to have been diagnosed with "PPD." Now, I know that that could be paranoid personality disorder. Unfortunately for your big reveal, I thought of postpartum depression. I was like, "But where's the child? Who could it be?" Sorry to ruin your surprise. Maybe she didn't have to be that crazy, you know? She was on like 10 medications for other things before you mentioned the Prozac. Just saying.

Thanks for your time.

Sincerely,
Josh Eats Birds